Controversial opinion alert: I don’t believe that change has to take a long time.
Some say true transformation takes many years or x dollars worth of therapy. Others swear by the concept that it takes 21 days of consistency to build a habit. Then, there are special cases, such as a person who gets an unexpected diagnosis and summons the strength to immediately quit smoking, nix fast food, or switch off incessant negativity, cold turkey.
I don’t know that there’s truly a formula when it comes to rewiring your identity and kicking off the process of transformation, but I feel that it comes from a mixture of desire, commitment, and belief, or rather your ability to imagine yourself differently.
I wanted to share my personal experience along with some tips for rewiring your identity in 10 minutes a day. Your results will come directly from the three key factors mentioned above:
- Your desire to change
- A commitment to consistency
- Your belief that it’s possible for you
Ten Minute Habits to Rewire Your Identity
Our identity is not only linked to the way we see ourselves but also to the way we imagine other people see us. These ideas may or may not be rooted in reality, but they sure as heck are shaping our realities. As the late Bob Proctor always said, “we’re determined to act like the person we believe we are.”
The best example I can think of has to do with my own health and fitness.
Like so many women, I struggled with my body image for years, alternating between putting myself on strict diets, binge eating, and repeating. I finally eased up on dieting and found a sort of balance with my health. I was thin, but not necessarily fit, and apart from walking a lot, exercise wasn’t really a priority for me.
Then, I dated a guy with washboard abs. One day, he insulted me, saying that if I just started working out more, I’d be in great shape. I got so mad, but I also realized that I sort of agreed with him. I wanted to be fit. I wanted to have a proper exercise routine. I wanted to eat more vegetables and feel strong. I just didn’t think of myself as that type of person.
The solution I came up with was simple. I was going to start doing a workout every single weekday, five days a week, for just ten minutes a day. I could commit to that. Ten minutes wasn’t so scary. I found a pilates channel on YouTube that I really liked and started off my day by rolling out my yoga mat.
In just two weeks or so, I was already feeling dramatically different, not only in terms of my energy levels but also about my own self-image. I started thinking of myself as someone who worked out every single weekday because, hey, that’s what I was doing. The fact that the workout was only ten minutes long didn’t matter. I was rewiring my identity by showing up consistently.
These ten minutes eventually turned into fifteen. Then, twenty. And now I do workouts five days a week for twenty minutes or so. On top of this I walk for the equivalent of an hour a day, go to dance classes regularly, and run three times per week. My body naturally craves lots of veggies and whole grains. Greek yogurt with honey and fresh fruit. Healthy fats and lean proteins. YUM.
I eat dessert and junk food when I want, but it doesn’t happen too often because I’m in love with this feeling of being strong and energized. The 80-20 rule just sort of naturally plays out for me, without any overthinking or calculation.
All of these changes have come about because I started with that simple mindset shift and a corresponding daily habit to reinforce it, which sparked an identity revolution in me. I’m a fit person. I’m strong. I’m active. I’m healthy.
How To Apply This To Your Own Life
Think of what it is that you’d most like to change, or how you’d like to see yourself. Sure, there are probably a lot of different things you’d like to change, but think of one main identity shift you’d like to make at this time and focus on that.
This could be anything. Maybe you want to be a writer, but you’ve never written more than emails and grocery lists. Start writing for ten minutes every morning. Let yourself write longer if you want to, but don’t make it necessary if it’s not flowing. It’s important not to worry about writing perfect prose or scintillating stories. Let it be bad. Just focus on the act of writing.
Maybe you want to become someone who’s more confident. You can approach this in a number of ways. Maybe you push yourself out of your comfort zone by spending ten minutes a day sending an email or making a cold call to someone who you admire. You could ask them for advice about something, even confidence itself. Or maybe once a day you make yourself chat with a stranger, in the grocery checkout line, on the subway, in a coffee shop. This forces you to do something uncomfortable, face rejection and realize that it won’t kill you.
Maybe you want to feel organized. Spend ten minutes a day, planning out your week, cleaning out your inbox, or tidying up your home.
If you want to be a runner, but have never run in your life. Start running for ten minutes, or even just five, every morning.
If you start doing something every single day or even five days a week, no one gets to tell you that you’re not that thing. Even if you’re only running for five minutes or writing for ten. When an action becomes a part of your daily routine, it’s part of who you are. It’s part of your identity.
When your motivation wanes, tap into that desire to feel like a different kind of person. Think of yourself as being the new, shifted version of you, who is [insert noun or adjective here]. Affirmations and visualizations can be quite helpful here as well, when you need some inspirational backup. That’s the belief part of all of this.
You get to decide who you are. Start hammering in your new identity with just ten minutes of dedication a day. Let it grow from there.
