Photo by superstar Rhianna May Photography
For some, routine is pleasant. For some, it’s torture. And for most of us it can start as the former and turn into the latter over time. Without really noticing why or when, you start to feel like Bill Murray in Groundhog Day, searching for a way to break free without getting any closer to bringing on substantial change.
The alarm clock goes off and you think, “today will be different.” You pour your coffee with purpose, read something inspirational, smile at strangers on the subway, and review your checklist for the day. But before lunch time rolls around your motivation is waning, your stomach is growling, and you’re on the fast track to slipping back into the fog of sameness that’s been enveloping you, clouding your vision, and extinguishing your motivation.
When we start to feel stuck and bogged down by our day to day, it’s hard not to fall prey to emotional exhaustion. However, sometimes when you don’t know what to do, all you really have to do is something. You may just be one tiny tweak away from shaking off the blahs and shimmying into a better headspace.
Here are a few key ways to break up your “stuckness” and intentionally, deliberately, liberate yourself from feelings of hopelessness swapping them for clarity and change.
Meditate
We can’t hit a target we don’t have. You can’t get to a destination unless you define it. And with all of the noise and the go-go-go pace of life, slowing down and getting quiet is the only way to tap into your intuition. The world can get so loud at times that we can’t hear ourselves think. This is why it’s so important to be stubborn about carving out time to tune into your thoughts and connect with yourself, barring all outside distractions. We all have the answers we need inside of us already. The trick is to go within and distinguish your own voice from that of society, your parents, your friends, your social media feed, even your professional and well-meaning therapist etc. Your voice is the only one that matters because no one else wants for you what you want for yourself.
Do Something You’ve Never Done Before
The only way to get something you’ve never gotten is by doing something you’ve never done. In the book, “Breaking The Habit of Being Yourself,” Dr. Joe Dispenza talks about how our personalities are frameworks for how we behave and thus determine the results we create in our lives. We get addicted to our feelings and come to expect certain outcomes and emotions on a daily basis. The only way to get a new result is by changing our thoughts and breaking out of these patterns that have become so ingrained in us.
Meditation will help you loosen the bolts and become aware of your automatic thoughts. But you also have to dare to think of yourself differently. Do something completely out of character and surprise yourself. You know when you attempt something kind of out of bounds for you and pull it off (giving a speech, playing softball, writing an article) and you feel totally awesome like “hot damn dog, I am a badass” that’s because you’ve surprised yourself.
Sign up for a history class, a pottery class, a language class. Join a rock climbing gym. Go on a solo trip, a health retreat, or attend an event you would have never considered attending before. Do something, anything, that makes you uncomfortable and think of it as an adventure. Life can be as thrilling as you decide to make it. Decide to push yourself outside of your comfort zone. Then, push further.
Exercise Differently
The thing about working out is that it requires you to be present in the moment. Sure, your mind can still move faster than your feet at times when you’re running downhill, but on those steep inclines, or when the HIIT instructor demands ten more burpees, or when the yoga teacher tells you to put your arm – excuse me, where? – you have to come back to your body to get the job done.
It can be tempting to shuffle through same ten fitness videos on YouTube, do the same type of exercise, or pick out the same treadmill at the gym. Third row, second from the left. But one way to surprise yourself and switch up your mental patterns is by trying a new way of working out. This could mean swapping your typical evening job for salsa lessons, making a commitment to do yoga when you usually light weights, or finally seeing what the buzz about barre workouts is all about. Exercising in a new way is a great way to remind yourself how mentally strong you are while getting physically stronger. This, in turn, reminds you of your capacity for change.
Mix Up Your Social Scene
When we hang out with the same people, we tend to know more or less what our conversations are going to be about, what type of jokes to expect, what activities we’ll be doing, and how much alcohol will or will not be consumed while doing them. Even if you have fantastic friends who support you and inspire you, meeting new people can be a refreshing way to push yourself to expand socially. Try socializing in a new way by joining a club, volunteering, doing a language exchange or signing up for a mastermind group. Mingling with new people will expose you to new perspectives which can, in turn, stir up new ideas, feelings, or desires within you.
Unplug
One of the easiest ways to feel blocked, stuck, or be reminded of who you are/who you’re not is by spending long periods of your day scrolling through social media, binge-watching TV, or surfing the internet. Technology has become so integral in our daily lives that it feels more normal to consume, consume, consume, than it does to ration your intake. Put some rules in place about when you’ll be “online” when you’re not required to be and be strict about upholding them. Maybe you check your phone three times a day for 20 minutes. Maybe you give yourself an hour to watch shows in the evening and then trade your laptop for a novel. Finding some ways to discipline yourself around being so constantly connected helps you rewire your brain and wake up to the sensory experiences in your life. Are those actual birds chirping outside my window? I’m used to a symphony of TikTok sounds, playing on a loop. This one shift creates more energetic space in your life for your thoughts to take shape instead of letting your thoughts be shaped by external, digital forces.
Read, Read, Read
And read some more. When you can’t travel? Read. When you want to learn something new? Read. When you feel lonely and lost? Read. There’s a book about everything under the sun. From nonfiction business books to personal essays, Medieval history to WWII fiction, Pablo Neruda love poems to the dark, twisted prose of Edgar Allen Poe. Go to a bookstore and wander into a section you normally don’t frequent. Switching up your typical nightstand paperback is an easy way to dive into a different world or flirt with new ideas under the comfort of your comforter.
